Change from the inside

Why does if feel better to stay where we are at rather than to be free? Really, why do we stay at  a job we don't like only to complain day after day, continue with a marriage that may be unhealthy, look in the mirror and see an overweight unhealthy person looking back? I'm not talking about quiting a job or leaving a spouse.... I'm talking about CHANGING the way we think about or look at a situation. We all have the ability to change. But it takes the action to do so and if we want it bad enough we should be unstoppable.
The most important thing I have learned over this past year is to change the way I think. This was the HARDEST change I made (and still making)  and has come soooooo slowly! I was completely resistant, resistant because I didn't think I needed to change.  I mean why should I, if I lose the weight won't I just naturally become a happier person?  NO! I was losing the weight but still had the negative image, negative thought process. I started to really realize it over this past summer when I felt like I  kept hitting road block after road block. Obstacles that were out of my control were getting in the way of my weight loss goal. My trainer/coach pointed out that if I did not start changing what I thought in my head and how I reacted to situations, I was not going to really transform to become the person I had set out to be. I will be honest.... I did not like hearing that, I got angry, I pulled back on my training, I copped a major attitude.  At that time I seriously considered leaving bootcamp, leaving my trainer and doing it on my own. But there was a different plan for me (thank goodness!)  First of all  I have a trainer that will NEVER give up on me, I have a great group of friends that would NEVER let me quit.
When I started to change my negative thoughts ( thoughts usually always directed at myself) I started noticing that I felt lighter, less stress and more affection towards others and suddenly life didn't seem so bad. But then I would quickly get sucked back in. I would try on an outfit that didn't fit and say something negative to myself which quickly unfolded into "see, I'm not going to lose weight, not going to make my goal, what's the point?" AHHH YUCK!!! don't do that!!!
Next I started looking at how I saw others, I would look at facebook and I would see so much negativity! (Don't get mad at me now)  How many people have you seen post this: "my job stinks, another 8 hours in this blank hole, my landlord did this, my spouse, boyfriend is this, to hell with our country!"  When I read that, I get a little negative......... NO, A LOT negative. You start to fall into that trap  and pretty soon YOUR spreading even more negativity" Think about it, how does that start to make you feel? If I wrote a blog that was all about the bad stuff of losing weight and kept writing negative thoughts would you keep reading? NO!!
I had a negativity problem at my work place, it was a daily occurrence. And I will be completely honest..... I was one of those that would fuel the fire. It's not a good place to be my friends, you do not set a good example that way, what you are setting is a poor example. It is so much better to lead by a positive example and be motivating and uplifting because that is what motivates people to improve upon themselves.  Don't you want to be that person that inspires and motivates verses discourage and dissuades? I know I do! All that negativity brings UNWANTED attention. You may not realize it (I know I didn't) but it IS negative attention and it WILL damage your character. When you start to change the way you think and then ultimately the way you behave, people will WANT to be around you, you will feel happier, and it will be POSITIVE attention. Over the past 2-3 weeks I have had many people stop me and tell me that I inspire them, they are reading this blog and feel it pertains to them in some way. THIS kind of attention is so much better then the attention I would get from the "old Jen" It feels so much better and I see people for who they are...... full of love and respect and genuine character. If you are in that trap, where you often think or speak negativity.... STOP.  I give you permission to change, and I will let you in on a secret......it's okay, people won't say "hey where did that other person go?" No they will really start to see you for you and all that you were meant to be!
My challenge: spend 48 hours without writing or speaking anything negative. Then spend the next 24 hours without a single negative thought!  Here's to a happier more beautiful you!